PJ's Personal Archives
A post to the ehe.org discussion list [telepathy or control?]
Many years ago, I had an experience I found sort of interesting with thought-transference. Mind you, it's not that I'd never had experiences with what some people might call that, but most the others were things I would call something more akin to "imposing my will" and/or "sudden knowing" of others' thoughts. During this one week around 1994 though, I had a rather literal, verbal-word set of experiences different than any others I've had before or since.
The circumstance was, I was really exhausted. I was overworked, undersleep'd, stressed out due to some huge work issues (like if I didn't find a way to reinvent the past so it'd pass an audit, my CEO'd go to prison for stuff done by a former VP...), and frankly I was just in a FOUL mood that week. That was unusual, I usually don't take my moods to work with me, but that week was pretty bad.
Now one of my employees, a clerical assistant, was a woman who I wasn't overly fond of at that point, mostly because she was very passive aggressive. E.g., she was always droolingly polite (to the point of artificial), but would quite deliberately file stuff like "Motorola" under "Q" for example, and if asked to do anything she didn't like it increased exponentially, until it was obvious it was not accidental.
She was on some kind of medication manic depression/bi-polar stuff, but that's just an aside, and I only include it due to some of the folks on the list who have an interest in 'psychological problems' actually perhaps being sparked by, and/or rooted in, 'psi issues'.
I came into work one morning just seething over life in general. I was not happy with her for a few reasons and planned to avoid her that day since I was not exactly cheerful. Then I realized I'd left a report I had printed out in the other office where she worked (the small building right next door). Boy that made me grouchier. I did not want to go get it, to understate it.
I was so sleep deprived it didn't even occur to me to question myself. Angrily I had this instant-daydream, where I thought AT her, "Bring me the budget report I printed out and left on your desk. Ask me if I want you to finish the pre-audit printouts we left off some days ago." I glared fiercely at my desk, sighed and continued working.
Not 30 seconds later -- I mean, she would literally have had to have jumped up the moment I finished thinking and walked directly to me -- she walks into my office, puts it on my desk and says, "Here's the budget report you printed out and left on my desk. Do you want me to finish the pre-audit printouts we left off some days ago?"
Now the first thing that got my attention was that she actually volunteered to do something, which was considerably out of character for her.
The second thing that got my attention was that she used the EXACT WORDING that I had in my angry daydream-thought-at-her. I hadn't expected her to respond to me of course, I mean not consciously -- I had the thought, then grouchily let go of it and went on with what I was doing.
I looked at her probably oddly, and then said, "Yeah. Thanks." And she walked out.
In the afternoon the next day, it got a little more interesting. I needed a file on a certain now-inactive investor. The file was in the other building, in the back warehouse, in the investor filing cabinet. I thought very hard about needing it. Then I thought very hard in a daydream about her bringing it to me. (Because, of course, I was too damn lazy to get up and get it myself. :-)) I was still totally aggravated with reality across the board, and so I just frowned at my paperwork, realizing I'd have to go get it later, and then went back to what I was doing for that moment.
About three minutes later she comes into my office, and says, "Here's XYZ's file." And she puts it on my desk.
And she suddenly gets this look on her face that is very hard to put into words, but is probably closest to *fear.* I realized, as I looked at her and she at me, that she had NO IDEA why the hell she had gone and dug out this folder and brought it to me. I said, "Thanks!," being very cheerful suddenly, because it had just occurred to me that she felt really weird and maybe scared.
She slowly walked out.
Now this sort of thing happened -- her repeating the exact words I'd thought of, and/or doing stuff WAY out of the blue there was no physical reason for her to think of -- all week. At the time, I was so weary and annoyed about everything that I only gave it half a thought, like, "Hmmmn. Interesting. Convenient, isn't it. Well, back to work."
Later I had a cross between compassion and humor, imagining this poor woman, already on drugs for psychological issues and here me 'shouting daydream-thoughts' she seemed to pick up quite literally probably didn't help her at all.
But what I found interesting later on reflection, was that during that same period, I did what I think was about the same thing with other employees, most of whom were much closer to me (I mean in a personal sense). None of them responded except one who 'sort of' did, later in the day, and it may have been coincidence.
This one woman was the only person who not only responded but damn near acted like my thoughts were the voice of the commander or something. Knowing her personal 'issues', I wondered at the time if this could have anything to do with her seeming perceptivity.
Well, that's it. Not a very exciting story, I know. I never tried this again, but I didn't really even "try" it then, it was just that I was so sleep deprived that I was half in dreamland and didn't question the seeming merger of my thoughts and reality. I didn't really think much about it until probably six months later, and I found it just as anomalous and interesting that I didn't think very much about it at the time, as that it happened at all.
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